Second Chance Summer by Sarah Kapit

Second Chance Summer by Sarah Kapit

Author:Sarah Kapit
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Henry Holt and Co. (BYR)


Maddie

THEN: APRIL

With less than ten minutes before showtime, the backstage area is in sheer chaos. Between people talking too loudly and a group of boys practicing “Lida Rose,” my attention keeps flickering from place to place.

Focus, I chant to myself. Just focus on me.

Unfortunately, me isn’t doing particularly well at the moment. Between my too-tight costume and my nerves, it takes all of my energy to breathe normally.

Why did I ever allow Chloe to talk me into this?

But I did, and now I’m standing backstage trying to ignore the itchiness creeping all over my skin. The sweat soaking through my armpits.

I look at myself in the mirror and make a face at my reflection. I wish I didn’t have to wear this green lacy monster of a costume. Apart from the fact that it’s the most hideous thing I’ve ever worn, the woman who made it annoyed me. While she took my measurements, she tut-tutted about how much fabric she needed to use and didn’t I know that I should eat less cake. Flames erupted in my cheeks while I tried to hold in my stomach as much as I could, hoping to make myself just a little bit smaller. Now the dress presses in on my body, smooshing my belly and the boobs that sprang from my chest way too quickly these past few months.

Sometimes—not all of the time, but sometimes—I wish I was just less. Less big, less round, less clunky. More like Chloe, who I’m sure has never been told to eat less cake.

The thoughts threaten to suffocate me. I close my eyes and try to push past it with a gulp of the raspberry lemonade Sandra made for me. At least my throat won’t be dry when it’s time for me to sing.

Chewing my lip, I glance over at Chloe. She, of course, looks entirely put together. Almost bored, really. If not for her beautiful blue dress, I would think she’s sitting in math class, just waiting for our teacher to go over problem seven.

Right now, I cannot help but resent her, just a little bit.

“How are you like that?” I ask before I can think better of it.

She frowns at me. “Like what?”

Of course Chloe doesn’t understand, not even a little. “Never mind,” I say.

It’s pointless even to hope that Chloe could understand anything I’m feeling right now.

But then she takes me by surprise.

“Maddie. I wanted to thank you.”

The words sound strange coming out of Chloe’s mouth.

“For what?” I ask.

“For doing all this. I know you didn’t want to, but you did it for me.”

I nod. Hearing her acknowledge that out loud makes my shoulders feel lighter. The knots in my chest still flutter, but it is something.

“You’re very welcome,” I say.

Although I thought that would be the end of this conversation, it isn’t.

“If you have a … problem … onstage…” Chloe begins. “And I’m not saying anything bad will happen! I think you’ll be great. You should be more confident in yourself.”

I raise an eyebrow.



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