Second Chance Summer by Sarah Kapit
Author:Sarah Kapit
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Henry Holt and Co. (BYR)
Maddie
THEN: APRIL
With less than ten minutes before showtime, the backstage area is in sheer chaos. Between people talking too loudly and a group of boys practicing âLida Rose,â my attention keeps flickering from place to place.
Focus, I chant to myself. Just focus on me.
Unfortunately, me isnât doing particularly well at the moment. Between my too-tight costume and my nerves, it takes all of my energy to breathe normally.
Why did I ever allow Chloe to talk me into this?
But I did, and now Iâm standing backstage trying to ignore the itchiness creeping all over my skin. The sweat soaking through my armpits.
I look at myself in the mirror and make a face at my reflection. I wish I didnât have to wear this green lacy monster of a costume. Apart from the fact that itâs the most hideous thing Iâve ever worn, the woman who made it annoyed me. While she took my measurements, she tut-tutted about how much fabric she needed to use and didnât I know that I should eat less cake. Flames erupted in my cheeks while I tried to hold in my stomach as much as I could, hoping to make myself just a little bit smaller. Now the dress presses in on my body, smooshing my belly and the boobs that sprang from my chest way too quickly these past few months.
Sometimesânot all of the time, but sometimesâI wish I was just less. Less big, less round, less clunky. More like Chloe, who Iâm sure has never been told to eat less cake.
The thoughts threaten to suffocate me. I close my eyes and try to push past it with a gulp of the raspberry lemonade Sandra made for me. At least my throat wonât be dry when itâs time for me to sing.
Chewing my lip, I glance over at Chloe. She, of course, looks entirely put together. Almost bored, really. If not for her beautiful blue dress, I would think sheâs sitting in math class, just waiting for our teacher to go over problem seven.
Right now, I cannot help but resent her, just a little bit.
âHow are you like that?â I ask before I can think better of it.
She frowns at me. âLike what?â
Of course Chloe doesnât understand, not even a little. âNever mind,â I say.
Itâs pointless even to hope that Chloe could understand anything Iâm feeling right now.
But then she takes me by surprise.
âMaddie. I wanted to thank you.â
The words sound strange coming out of Chloeâs mouth.
âFor what?â I ask.
âFor doing all this. I know you didnât want to, but you did it for me.â
I nod. Hearing her acknowledge that out loud makes my shoulders feel lighter. The knots in my chest still flutter, but it is something.
âYouâre very welcome,â I say.
Although I thought that would be the end of this conversation, it isnât.
âIf you have a ⦠problem ⦠onstageâ¦â Chloe begins. âAnd Iâm not saying anything bad will happen! I think youâll be great. You should be more confident in yourself.â
I raise an eyebrow.
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